Archives for category: Ex’s

I am spreading the love for Slimming World as in my first week I managed to lose 6lbs. I am so pleased.  It may not seem a lot but it has given me the motivation to stick with it.

Don’t worry I am not stupid I know that in the first few weeks you always lose a bit more than normal but I don’t mind even if I lose a few pounds a week as it all helps.

Normally on weigh in day I have a little cheat….. That’s probably where I have gone wrong in the past. This time I didn’t though I continued with the plan and used my full 15 syns.

Doing this “healthy eating plan” has made me put myself first which is nice. I am really enjoying the swimming, even when I am feeling shattered in the evenings once I am in there I feel so much better.

Also it has taken my mind off dating.  It’s nice to have a break as otherwise you find yourself talking to people who you know are not really your cup of tea, so why waste your time and there’s making idle chit chat.

I am still chatting to my Electrician Essex Boy. If I am honest I have no idea what is going on as we both flirt with each other and there still seems to be a spark but I have decided that what will be will be and I will not get hung up about it. He was always a hard one to read so best not even try.

Being friends is good enough for me at the moment or am I just kidding myself?!

 

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2011 has been an amazing year. Never regret anything you do as that is what life is all about, living and learning. If you don’t make mistakes how are you meant to learn from them?

I have met some prize idiots this year but that is what dating is all about. You have to take the rough with the smooth and it makes great story telling.

In 2011 have I have dated 9 men actually make that 10……

One of them reminded me of my ex boyfriend

Another did not look like his picture

Two of them looked much better than their picture

Three of them I knew I didn’t like as soon as we met up – no spark

One looked like he was 17 and was certainly not athletic build

One broke my heart twice!

One has become a good friend of mine

And one …. Well who knows yet but I am looking forward to finding out!

I have learnt that friends are an extension of your family as they mean that much to you. Some friendships you out grow but you are glad of the memories that you share with them.

Sometimes you will not always have the answers your friends are looking for, but just by listening to them you are helping.

Most importantly I have learnt that the decisions I make are right for me and no-one else, people can have their views and opinion’s on what I do but at the end of the day it’s down to me.

Right or wrong I will find out for myself!

Thanks 2011 I have learnt a lot, but you know what there is always more to learn and I am ready for it……

After a very busy week at work I was looking forward to the weekend. I had a date planned for Friday night but that didn’t happen. In one way I was secretly pleased. I was telling the girls on Saturday. I feel like I SHOULD be dating but to be honest I don’t want to just yet. I can’t stop thinking about my Electrician Essex boy it’s doing my head in. I miss chatting to him, he didn’t always have a lot to say but he always made me laugh.

Saturday was another gorgeous day and we had planned a girlie Sex In The City afternoon tea,  5 * hotel, cakes (check out the pic at the bottom), champagne, flirtni’s it was lovely and a chance for us girls to catch up. Two of the girls couldn’t make it but it was still nice to see the others.

After our posh afternoon tea we headed back home to Dartford football club as they were having a ladies night. Now this might just be us but when someone says ladies night, we thought, strippers, baby oiled up men, g strings….. our imagination’s were running wild!  Lucky we have good imagination’s  as when we arrived we were faced with a sea of bored housewive’s sitting around listening to a singer, who was very good may I just add but he didn’t know any songs from this era!  

We thought our prayers had been answered when the smoke alarm went off,  two fire engines turned up, but they were real fireman and they were not interested in getting their hose out for anyone! 

We were tempted to join the 18th birthday party as the music up there was excellent but we decided to call it a night. I have to say, I wasn’t expecting to be sober when I got home at 11pm but we still had a giggle.

All in all it was a great weekend even managed to sort out my garden with the help of my parents.

Who know’s what this week has in store for me, but I’ll be ready for it as always.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I feel like I have lost the will to live to be honest with you, but you have got to be in it to win it!

I have re activated my account on plenty of issues but finding it a bit hard as my Electrician Essex boy is also on there and he keeps popping up. I really wish things had been different with us. I miss chatting to the miserable sod haha.

I used to find the online dating thing fun but now I’m finding it hard work. I can normally talk the hind legs off a donkey but it’s just not happening for me at the moment. It’s like having another job, I finish one then I feel like I have to start my next one … Flicking through all the pictures and reading profiles which all seem to say the same thing!  A friend of mine recently asked me if there was anyone at work I liked?  Honestly no there isn’t I’ve done the work thing before and yes it was fun … Actually very fun, but I really don’t want to get into that again, I like my job too much.

I have never been fussy about the people I speak to …in that I mean, I’ve never minded where they live, if they have kids, if they were once married etc but maybe I should? But doesn’t that defeat the whole point of doing internet dating that you meet someone who you wouldn’t normally?

At my age it’s rare to find someone who doesn’t have kids, or a past and that is fair enough. We all have a past that is what makes us.

Maybe I need to find a new dating site? If you have any suggestions please let me know.

 

 

 

Nothing! That’s what.

After a few good weeks with my Electrician Essex Boy things have come to an end AGAIN. But this time I’m fine about it as I think deep down I knew this would happen.

I’m a talker so when things are bothering me I need to say something as I don’t see the point in bottling things up. Where does that get you?

 

Maybe things would have been different if……. Well actually it doesn’t matter now.

 

I’m glad he got in touch again and we tried again as there would have always been that horrible “what if” in my mind.

We had some great nights,lots of laughing so I am thankful for that.

My time will come and in the mean time who knows what will happen!

 

 

For the last month or so I have been trying to get over my Electrician Essex Boy and it’s not been easy at all. It never is when you like someone. Normally I would get myself out on a date but this time I have not wanted too, why…. Because it wasn’t with him!

Then a few Friday’s ago I was sitting in the office, When  my phone lights up with a number that I don’t know……..

“How’s you stranger? x”

 I have no idea who it is so I reply “Sorry who is this?”

The next reply was not what I was expecting…. “It’s your electrician friend”

My heart literally missed a beat… Yes you guessed it, its My Electrician Essex Boy.

Whilst I am happy that his got in touch with me, it’s the last thing I was expecting. We text for a bit, doing the, how have you been chat…. When really all I want to say is why did you stop talking to me! but I resist for a bit. Not for long though as I can’t help it, so I blurt out, “what happened that weekend?”

And I wait…….

It doesn’t take him long to come back to me with an answer. It seems that he had been getting grief from his ex and he read something that he shouldn’t have read. I go back to him saying, you having trouble with your ex doesn’t mean you need to take it out on me.

That’s when he comes back with, I read your blog……….. the one about your ex getting in touch with you!

From the start I told him that I wrote a dating blog and he found it funny, but he always said he couldn’t remember the name of it and therefore wouldn’t read it, and to be honest I didn’t think he would be interested in it. To me writing this blog, is my escapism, as no one really knows who I am, so I can say what I truly feel at the time. Some say that I don’t show my emotions much, but I think I do when I write my blogs as people don’t judge me.

It turns out he was pissed off/upset that I didn’t tell him about the ex, but I didn’t feel I needed to tell him as it didn’t mean anything to me. I’ll admit, I thought about telling him but thought better of it, as I was scared he would think there was more to it and there wasn’t. It doesn’t matter what I did as I lost him anyway, or have I?

What is it with blokes, why can’t they talk about stuff.  If he had said to me about it I would have told him everything. I didn’t want to hide anything from him, I liked him too much for that. Anyway no point going over the,should have, could have, would have.

So what happens now with My Electrician Essex Boy…… Well It’s been a few weeks now since he got in touch and I am pleased to say it is going well.

I love that we are speaking again and when I see him it makes me smile.  What more can I ask for!

I am a very happy Doris.

It’s been a month since I broke up with Electrician Essex Boy.  Well I am guessing we have broken up as he hasn’t spoken to me since that silly row, and I know he hasn’t broken his fingers as his back on the dating site that we met on, so his able to type. Ha ha

There are have been some tears, a lot of thinking and even a bit of anger, as we all go through those stages. Now I am at the stage where I am chatting to people again but I am just not feeling it. I have been chatting to some really nice blokes, but as soon as they say lets chat on the phone or those dreaded words, let’s meet up. I seem to run the other way.

Dating is all about the thrill of the chase, chatting to people, and wondering what will happen if you actually meet up. Will you or wont you get on? Will you have that spark?

It’s exciting when you’re dating.  I love it when you are getting ready and you have butterflies in your stomach, nerves are taking over.

Whilst writing this, it has got me thinking. I need to forget everything that has happened and I just need to be myself and have a laugh again.

If I meet up with someone and we get on then great and if we don’t maybe I’ll make a good friend or maybe I won’t but if I don’t try I am never going to know!

So if you find my …… please return to sender ASAP, you will know its mine as it will be labelled up, Lovable, Ginger, Essex, A Little Mad but in a good way!

 

When people say a problem shared is a problem halved, they are right!

It has been a strange few week’s… or if I am honest months. And during this time I have distanced myself from my friends when I needed them the most. It all came to a head when my best friend and I had a falling out which is most unheard of.

It was time to come clean about things, and I did. I was so worried about saying certain things but it felt so good to get it all off my chest. My friends have all said that they miss the happy and jolly Doris. So do I.

I am trying my best to get her back.

Work has been a difficult place to be as it seems we have been going through big changes every month. I think it’s now settling down, I am actually enjoying going into work. Don’t get me wrong it’s still busy and busy means you’re not clock watching so I am happy.

 My love life has been like a roller coaster. You all know that the last 9 weeks have been a struggle for me with a certain someone. But in a strange way I feel happier that we are not together anymore. My ex rocking up at my house really threw me and got me questioning myself about things that should never be questioned.

But that is all in the past. The next few months I am going to concentrate on me, me, me and my friends.

Don’t panic I havent given up dating altogether. I am still chatting to people but I have been honest and told them that I am not looking for anything at the moment.  

So watch this space, New Doris is coming soon!

Hobby!

Yes a hobby. I am so bored at the moment.  The feeling sorry for myself about breaking up with Electrician Essex Boy has now gone. That was quick I hear you say but come on lets be honest if he cant talk to me to tell me what was going then his not for me.

I may sound strong but I’ll let you into a secret,inside I am hurting like you wouldn’t know but if I tell myself that I am over it and I am happy then I will be.  There is no point in wasting my time thinking about someone who clearly isn’t thinking about me.

I deserve better!

I was talking to a friend of mine and said what makes you happy?

A few months ago I would have said dating makes me happy, how bad does that sound. It was fun and always a good laugh chatting to the girls about the nights events.

Now this shouldn’t have been a hard question but I actually didn’t have an answer. Of course my family and friends make me happy. But family and friends have their own lives to be getting on with. Its time to have something for me …… but what?

It seems like all I do is go to work, come home eat and do it all again the next day…..

I am going to look at a gym as I have been informed that exercising releases happy endorphins making you feel lots better about yourself, and who knows there might be some hot guys in the gym!

The same friend that asked me the question suggested dog walking…. she said this has she has two gorgeous dogs that I adore especially Charlie, I think it’s because he is ginger like me! Ha ha  

I am always open to ideas so if you can think of a hobby for me let me know!

By now you would have noticed I love giving people nick name’s, it’s something I’ve always done.

Last year I met a bloke, he was from Durham so I nick named him Northern Monkey, Monkey for short.

I should have known from the start that he was going to be trouble, my mates could see it but I couldn’t. Looking back on it I can see it now but isn’t that always the way!

For 6 months he put me through hell. He thought he could rock up to my house and I’d drop everything for him. At first I did, I never asked any questions. He would always get in touch and, me being a soft touch would give him the benefit of the doubt!

I know what an idiot.

He even asked me to marry him not once, twice but several times. He thought that would make it all better.

One night I had been out to dinner with the girls when I got an unknown call on my mobile. The first time I didn’t answer, I had a feeling it was going to be something to do with Monkey…. The second time i answered it. It was a girl asking me why my number was on her boyfriend’s mobile bill. So I asked who her boyfriend was.  Well I’m sure you have guessed already but yes it was Monkey!

She asked why he was calling me so I said she should ask him. She asked when I had seen him last so I was honest and said the weekend. She told me I was lying as he was at work!

She then told me that they were getting married….. I said I’m sorry to hear that as he had asked me to marry him as well but I said no.

As you can imagine the conversation got a bit nasty. I reminded her that it was her that called me and I was just being honest with her.

I ended the conversation by saying good luck marrying him as I think you’re going to need it.

I was upset but also relieved as it was all making sense now and I wasn’t going mad. He was living a double life!

I sent him one last text informing him that his fiancée had been in touch and I hoped the wedding went well!  Ok it wasn’t as nice as that, I couldn’t repeat what I actually put in that text.

I never heard from him again……….

That was until this weekend, I was having a great time sitting in the sun at my sisters when I got a Facebook request from him!

I felt sick, but that was soon replaced with anger. How bloody dare he. I rejected it straight away. Then carried on with my weekend.

I should point out at this stage that I am very happy at the moment life is going well. Work is busy but going well and I’ve met someone who makes me smile and means a lot to me.

I got home the next day and there was a note on the mat from Monkey. Once again I was fuming, he wanted to speak to me ASAP. Tough! I wanted to speak  to him 8 month ago.

What makes people like him think they can decide as and when he wants to speak to me, what could he have to say to me that he couldn’t have said 8 months ago?

Who cares… I don’t.

It’s Ex’s like these that make us girls strong!